Harold Budd

Harold

When I think about Harold Budd several different thoughts and images come to mind, one is an old alternate definition of ‘wine’ … Old English wine = Old Frisian winne, Middle Low German wine, Old Saxon, Old High German wini (Middle High German wine, win), Old Norse vinr. … a friend.

OE Beowulf 30 Þenden wordum weold wine Scyldinga. 1122 Anglo-Saxon Chron. (Laud) ann. 975 Eadgar..West-Seaxena wine. 1200 Moral Ode (Trin. Coll. MS.) 223 Werse he doð his gode wines þan his fiendes. 1220 Bestiary 374 Eurilc luuen oðer, Also he were his broder, Wurðen stedefast his wine. 1481 W. Caxton tr. Hist. Reynard Fox (1970) 70 He hath nether kyn ne wyn ne frende that wylle entreprise to helpe hym.

I was introduced to Harold by David Sylvian. David had sent me a letter (handwritten, charming), an invitation to release an album on Samadhisound. While we were working on it, he ask me to make a coda for Avalon Sutra as album was running short … the source recordings arrived as a box of blackface ADAT tapes. I took little bits here and there into a very slowly unwinding ostinato. The intention was for it to be ten or so minutes, but I wanted David to get his hand in so I made a seventy minute version and told David to cut it where and how he wanted … he used the whole long track as a second disc.

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図書館

第23章

那天夜里,我梦见了幽灵。

図​書​館

我不知道“幽灵”这一称呼是否正确,但至少那不是活着的实体,不是现实世界中的存在——这点一眼即可看出。

我被什么动静突然惊醒,看见那个少女的身影。尽管时值深夜,但房间里亮得出奇。是月光从窗口泻入。睡前本应拉合的窗帘此时豁然大开,月光中她呈现为轮廓清晰的剪影,镀了一层骨骸般荧白的光。

她大约和我同龄,十五或十六岁。肯定十六。十五与十六之间有明显差别。她身材小巧玲珑,姿态优雅,全然不给人以弱不禁风的印象。秀发笔直泻下,发长及肩,前发垂在额头。身上一条连衣裙,淡蓝色的,裙摆散开。裙子不长也不短,没穿袜子没穿鞋。袖口扣得整整齐齐。领口又圆又大,衬托出形状娇美的脖颈。

她在桌前支颐坐着,目视墙壁,正在沉思什么,但不像在思考复杂问题。相对说来,倒像沉浸在不很遥远的往事的温馨回忆中,嘴角时而漾出微乎其微的笑意。但由于月光阴影的关系,从我这边无法读取其微妙的表情。我佯装安睡,心里拿定主意:不管她做什么都不打扰。我屏住呼吸,不出动静。

我知道这少女是“幽灵”。首先她过于完美,美的不只是容貌本身,整个形体都比现实物完美得多,俨然从某人的梦境中直接走出的少女。那种纯粹的美唤起我心中类似悲哀的感情。那是十分自然的感情,同时又是不应发生在普通场所的感情。

我缩在被窝里大气不敢出,与此同时,她继续支颐凝坐,姿势几乎不变,只有下颚在手心里稍稍移一下位置,头的角度随之略略有所变化。房间里的动作仅此而已。窗外,紧挨窗旁有一株很大的山茱萸在月华中闪着恬静的光。风已止息,无任何声响传来耳畔,感觉上好像自己在不知不觉之间已经死去。我死了,同少女一起沉入深深的火山口湖底。

少女陡然停止支颐,双手置于膝头。又小又白的膝并拢在裙摆那里。她似乎蓦地想起什么,不再盯视墙壁,改变身体朝向,把视线对着我,手举在额头上触摸垂落的前发。那少女味儿十足的纤细的手指像要触发记忆似的留在额前不动。她在看我。我的心脏发出干涩的声响。但不可思议的是,我并没有被人注视的感觉。大概少女看的不是我,而是我后面的什么。

我们两人沉入的火山口湖底,一切阒无声息。火山的活动已是很早以前的故事了。孤独如柔软的泥堆积在那里。穿过水层的隐约光亮,犹如远古记忆的残片白荧荧地洒向四周。深深的水底觅不到生命的迹象。她究竟看了我——或我所在的位置——多长时间呢?我发觉时间的规律已然失去。在那里,时间会按照心的需要而延长或沉积。但不一会儿,少女毫无征兆地从椅子上欠身立起,蹑手蹑脚地朝门口走去。门没开。然而她无声无息地消失在了门外。

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Spellwaveringshard

Spellwaveringshard

Carefully questions unraveled in their answers
upon polite observation, dipping and drawing
untempered charms and it will not love me
any more if I thought your speech charming,
did I not know you till I will unsay
the spell that holds me there…
how odde soever your braines be
or your wisedomes make your heart
is filled with tears, and she said
“you must do exactly as I tell you.”

scratched across and walks away, with that she
carefully washed all darkly translucent in their
wavering shadows, clings and clinging,
neuer giues to truth and vertue
that which simpleness and merit purchaseth,
and lay ages drop unto it as were rain.

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