The view from the East-facing window of my asylum, unless my work is yet another Hallucination …

Just a few words to tell you that I’m getting along so-so as regards my health and work.

Which I already find astonishing when I compare my state today with that of a month ago. I well knew that one could break one’s arms and legs before, and that then afterwards that could get better but I didn’t know that one could break one’s brain and that afterwards that got better too.

I still have a certain ‘what’s the good of getting better’ feeling in the astonishment that an ongoing recovery causes me, which I wasn’t in a state to dare rely upon.

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You will hardly know who I am or what I mean, but I shall be good health to you nevertheless

Song of Myself

I celebrate myself, and sing myself, And what I assume you shall assume, For every atom belonging to me as good belongs to you.

I loafe and invite my soul, I lean and loafe at my ease observing a spear of summer grass.

My tongue, every atom of my blood, form’d from this soil, this air, Born here of parents born here from parents the same, and their parents the same, I, now thirty-seven years old in perfect health begin, Hoping to cease not till death.

Creeds and schools in abeyance, Retiring back a while sufficed at what they are, but never forgotten, I harbor for good or bad, I permit to speak at every hazard, Nature without check with original energy.

(2)

Houses and rooms are full of perfumes, the shelves are crowded with perfumes, I breathe the fragrance myself and know it and like it, The distillation would intoxicate me also, but I shall not let it.

The atmosphere is not a perfume, it has no taste of the distillation, it is odorless, It is for my mouth forever, I am in love with it, I will go to the bank by the wood and become undisguised and naked, I am mad for it to be in contact with me.

The smoke of my own breath, Echoes, ripples, buzz’d whispers, love-root, silk-thread, crotch and vine, My respiration and inspiration, the beating of my heart, the passing of blood and air through my lungs, The sniff of green leaves and dry leaves, and of the shore and dark-color’d sea-rocks, and of hay in the barn,

The sound of the belch’d words of my voice loos’d to the eddies of the wind, A few light kisses, a few embraces, a reaching around of arms, The play of shine and shade on the trees as the supple boughs wag, The delight alone or in the rush of the streets, or along the fields and hill-sides, The feeling of health, the full-noon trill, the song of me rising from bed and meeting the sun.

Have you reckon’d a thousand acres much? have you reckon’d the earth much? Have you practis’d so long to learn to read? Have you felt so proud to get at the meaning of poems?

Stop this day and night with me and you shall possess the origin of all poems, You shall possess the good of the earth and sun, (there are millions of suns left,) You shall no longer take things at second or third hand, nor look through the eyes of the dead, nor feed on the spectres in books, You shall not look through my eyes either, nor take things from me, You shall listen to all sides and filter them from your self.

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Catherine’s rules for behavior for all entering these doors

  • Leave all ranks outside, likewise hats, and particularly swords.
  • Orders of precedence and haughtiness, or anything however similar, must be left at the door.
  • Be merry, but neither damage nor break anything, nor gnaw on anything.
  • Be seated, stand, walk, as you see fit, regardless of others.
  • Speak with moderation and not too loudly, that those present not have an earache or headache.
  • Argue without anger or passion.
  • Do not sigh or yawn, and do not bore or fatigue anyone.
  • Others should join in any innocent fun that someone thinks up.
  • Eat well, but drink with moderation, that each can always find his legs upon going out the door.
  • Disputes shall not be taken outside the izba† and what goes in one ear should go out the other before one steps through the doors.
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Satyricon, I need not go to the poets for evidence

Pars quarta

Then we all three swore the most solemn oaths the horrid secret should die with us

Operi modo oculos, et finge te non humana viscera, sed centies sestertium comesse. Accedit huc, quod aliqua inveniemus blandimenta, quibus saporem mutemus. Neque enim ulla caro per se placet, sed arte quadam corrumpitur, et stomacho conciliatur averso.

At this crisis amazement and consternation quite broke our spirit, certain death seeming to stare us miserably in the face. “I beseech you, lady,” I cried, “if you have any sinister design, put us out of our misery at once; we have done nothing so heinous as to deserve torturing to death.” The maid, whose name was Psyche, now carefully spread a rug on the marble floor, and endeavored to rouse my member into activity, but it lay cold as a thousand deaths could make it. Ascyltos had muffled his head in his mantle, having doubtless learned from experience the peril of meddling with other people’s secrets. Meantime Psyche produced two ribbons from her bosom, and proceeded to tie our hands with one and our feet with the other. Finding myself thus fettered, “This is not the way,” I protested, “for your mistress to get what she wants.” “Granted,” replied the maid; “but I have other remedies to my hand, and surer ones.”

So saying, she brought me a goblet full of satyrion, and with quips and cranks and a host of wonderful tales of its virtues, induced me to drain off nearly the whole of the liquor. Then, because he had slighted her overtures a little before, she poured what was left of the stuff over Ascyltos’s back without his noticing. The latter, seeing the stream of her eloquence dried up, exclaimed, “Well! and am I not thought worthy to have a drink too?” Betrayed by my laughter, the girl clapped her hands and cried, “Why! I’ve given it you already, young man; you’ve had the whole draft all to yourself.” “What!” put in Quartilla, “has Encolpius drunk up all our stock of satyrion?” and her sides shook with pretty merriment. Eventually not even Giton could contain his mirth, particularly when the little girl threw her arms round his neck, and gave the boy, who showed no signs of reluctance, a thousand kisses.

We should have cried out for help in our unhappy plight, but there was no one to hear us and besides Psyche pricked my cheeks with her hair pin every time I tried to call upon my fellow countrymen for succor, while at the same time the other girl threatened Ascyltos with a brush dipped in satyrion. Finally there entered a catamite, tricked out in a coat of chestnut frieze, and wearing a sash, who would alternately writhe his buttocks and bump against us, and beslaver us with the most evil-smelling kisses, until Quartilla, holding a whalebone wand in her hand and with skirts tucked up, ordered him to give the poor fellows quarter. Then we all three swore the most solemn oaths the horrid secret should die with us.

Continue reading “Satyricon, I need not go to the poets for evidence”

l’histoire secrète racontée entre les lignes sinueuses et le sens … We ðe, soðfæstan god, heriað and lofiað

OE Old Eng. Martyrol. (Corpus Cambr. 196) 22 Nov. 254 On þære nyhte þa heo wæs ingelæded on þone brydbur, þa sæde heo þam brydguman þæt heo gesawe engel of heofenum and se wolde hyne slean myd færdeaðe, gif he hyre æfre onhryne myd unclænre lufon. OE tr. Vitas Patrum in B. Assmann Angelsächsische Homilien u. Heiligenleben (1889) 197 Ða gelicode him sona ðurh deofles tihtince þæs hæþenan sacerdos dohtor. Began þa niman swyðe micle lufe to hyre and to hyre fæder gewænde and hy him to gemæccan gyrnde.

OE Old Eng. Hexateuch: Gen. (Claud.) xxiv. 67 Isaac gelædde Rebeccan in to Sarran getelde, hys modor, & underfeng hi to wife, & lufode hi swa swyðe, þæt he ðæt sar forgeat, þe him on hys modor deaðe gelamp. OE King Ælfred tr. Boethius De Consol. Philos. (Otho) xxii. 51 Ic wille [þe oðewan] forlustlice for ðinum lufum [L. tui causa libenter]. OE Resignation B 116 Þonne ic me to fremþum freode hæfde, cyðþu gecwe[me] me wæs a cearu symle lufena to leane, swa ic alifde nu. OE King Ælfred tr. Boethius De Consol. Philos. (Otho) xxxv. 101 Ne fo we no & [read on] ða bisna & on ða bispel for ðara leasena spella lufan, ac forðæmðe we woldon mid gebecnan þa soðfæstnesse. OE Genesis B 508 Ic gehyrde hine þine dæd and word lofian on his leohte and ymb þin lif sprecan. OE West Saxon Gospels: Matt. (Corpus Cambr.) xxiii. 6 Hig [sc. the scribes and the Pharisees] lufigeað þa fyrmystan setl on gebeorscypum, & þa fyrmystan lareowsetl on gesomnungum. OE Paris Psalter (1932) lxx. 21 Mine weleras gefeoð, wynnum lofiað, þonne ic þe singe, sigora wealdend, and min sawl eac. OE Cleopatra Gloss. in W. G. Stryker Lat.-Old Eng. Gloss. in MS Cotton Cleopatra A.III (Ph.D. diss., Stanford Univ.) (1951) 39 Affectu, for hylde & lufe. OE King Ælfred tr. Gregory Pastoral Care (Hatton) (1871) xxxiv. 231 Suiðe suiðe we gesyngiað, gif we oðerra monna welgedona dæda ne lufigað & ne herigað. OE Old Eng. Hexateuch: Gen. (Claud.) xxix. 20 Iacob him hyrsumode þa seofan gear for Rachele, & hit him þuhte feawa daga for þære lufe þe he to hyre hæfde [L. prae amoris magnitudine]. OE tr. Bede Eccl. Hist. (Tanner) iv. xxviii. 362 Swa mycel getydnes & gelærednes to sprecenne & swa mycel lufu godcundre lare [OE Corpus Oxf. swa mycel lufu to godcundre lare; L. tantus amor persuadendi]. OE tr. Bili St. Machutus 48 For þon þis idel lif nan þing elcor þam þe hit lufaþ byt nemþe synne. OE Laws of Æðelred II (Claud.) vi. xxix. 254 La understande man georne, þæt eal swylc [sc. swicollice dæda & laðlice unlaga] is to leanne & næfre to lufianne. OE Wærferð tr. Gregory Dialogues (Corpus Cambr.) (1900) iii. vii. 189 On æfentid ic geteah his mod to þon, þæt he lufode mid his bradre hand þa nunnan & ofer þa sculdru geþaccode. OE Wulfstan Institutes of Polity (Junius) 78 Eorlas and heretogan and ðas worulddeman and eac swa gerefan agan nydþearfe, þæt hi riht lufian for Gode and for worulde. OE Lord’s Prayer II 115 We ðe, soðfæstan god, heriað and lofiað. OE (Mercian) Vespasian Psalter (1965) xvii. 1 (2) Diligam te domine uirtus mea, domine firmamentum meum et refugium meum : ic lufiu ðe dryhten megen min dryhten trymenis min & geberg min. OE tr. Apollonius of Tyre (1958) i. 2 Þa ða se fæder þohte hwam he hi mihte healicost forgifan, þa gefeol his agen mod on hyre lufe mid unrihtre gewilnunge [L. pater..incidit in amorem filiae suae]. OE (Northumbrian) Lindisf. Gospels: John v. 42 Sed cognoui uos quia dilectionem dei non habetis in uobis: ah ic cuðe iuih þætte lufu godes [OE Rushw. lufo godes] ne habbas gie in iuih.

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